How are we punishing the sluts today?
How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/19/2012

As goes Kansas, so goes Missouri… except that our gang in Missouri is protecting the right of everyone from pharmacists to employers to keep birth control out of the hands of dirty sluts. Obviously, the consciences of these upstanding (mostly male) citizens supersede sluts’ right* to health care.

* Just kidding! Sluts don’t have rights.

How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/18/2012

*Snort.* "Family values" are only for people who can afford them, sluts.

How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/17/2012

Goddamn activist judges, always trying to tell us how to regulate the sluts. But we’re getting better about keeping them off the bench in the first place

How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/16/2012

Sometimes we like to tell folks we’re “speaking for the voiceless” (like when we tried to get that fetus to testify in Ohio - wasn’t that a riot?).

But you know better, don’t you?

How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/15/2012

Sometimes when we can’t pass shit on the national level we get angry and force it down Washington, D.C.’s throat. Not because we’re bullies or anything — but someone has to suffer. It’s like a law or something. (We passed it.)

How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/14/2012

Twice the lies means twice the punishment! That’s why we want doctors to lie to sluts about fetal anomalies (a la Arizona) and about a link between abortion and breast cancer (a la Indiana)! This is going to be so much fun!

How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/13/2012

Happy Mothers Day, sluts! You’re going to jail!

How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/12/2012

We’re going to make you sit in the corner and think about what you did, young lady. Er, what you’re about to do. For 72 hours.

How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/11/2012

More like Girl Sluts, amirite? Needless to say, “courage, confidence, character” are not traits we want to be developing in young females.

How are we punishing the sluts today? 5/10/2012

We changed the tax code to make it harder to get health insurance that covers abortion services — and to donate to Planned Parenthood. No, for real. We actually did this. Yup, Kansas again.